Giannna's Light

Dear Friend, please let me welcome you to this site.  If you are here, suffering, looking for light, I hope that we can help you, even just a little. 

If you have lost your sweet baby, please accept my deepest condolences.  I lost my little girl, Gianna Lynne, on April 15, 2009. She was born still at 28 weeks.  I know your pain, I know your sorrow.  My family and close friends have been wonderfully supportive as I take this journey.  I don't know where I would be without them.  I have also been lucky to find a tremendous group of women who have walked this path and they are a lifeline.  We support each other like no one else can.  Please join us at:

http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Stillbirth/support-group

I remember when I came home from the hospital after having Gianna and so desperately wanted to talk to someone, someone else who had experienced this pain. It was the middle of the night, and I found this group.  I simply cannot say enough about these ladies, and the support we give each other.

I am committed to do whatever I can to help other moms who are experiencing this tragedy.

Please don’t ever hesitate to contact me.

Hugs to you,
Sherri Horvat
sherri@giannaslight.org

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Gianna’s Ribbons

As I left my safe cocoon at the hospital after having Gianna, the room where everyone who entered knew what had happened and was oh-so kind and gentle, I was terrified to realize I was now back in the real world where that kindness was not a given.  I found myself wishing over and over again that I had a pin that said "My baby died.  Please be nice to me." to wear when I was out in the world, to perhaps garner a little kindness when I was having an especially raw day.

When I related that story in an email to Elizabeth McCracken, whose book, An Exact Replica of a Figment of My Imagination: A Memoir, is about the loss of her son, she said she has had many conversations with grieving people about what a shame it is that we've given up the tradition of wearing black for a year after a close death, so people could know to be tender. 

I wanted to see a return to this tradition, by wearing a black ribbon. The notion of awareness ribbons is certainly nothing new, and black ribbons already represent mourning.  I have come to understand that it's a Jewish tradition to wear a black ribbon for one month following the death of an immediate family member. You make a tear in the ribbon to indicate that your heart is torn, but the tear is in the fabric because fabric can be sewn back together, so though our hearts will never be the same, they will heal.

I want the black ribbon be a sign to everyone that the person wearing it has lost someone they love.  I made one for myself, with a pink crystal heart in the center for my girl.  When I’m wearing it, I feel like she is with me.  It’s my hope that people will come to know these ribbons, watch for them, and be tender.  I want them to know that it is their chance to bring the gift of light to that person, in that moment.

The ribbons are, in short, my more appropriate version of the “My baby died.  Please be nice to me.” pin.

I make and distribute Gianna’s ribbons, black ribbons with crystal hearts (pink hearts for girls, clear for boys), for bereaved families.  Please contact me if you would like some for yourself or to distribute in your area.

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